Work in Progress - Vanessa

"My boyfriend gets into a fight with some guy at our community college, and his eye is all busted up."  And then I tell Patti the real story, "The neighbor's cat scratched it, bad.  He can barely drive."  She laughs as I go on about how we're all drivers in our spare time.  And I talk about the story of this future, how I got talked into going to graduation in the first place.

Beast puts his feet up on the lounger next to mine.  His presence interrupts my thoughts about the kind of session I'd like to have with Patti.  It's getting harder for me to remember what his conversations were like. 

"Ask me about the wheatgrass Marianne tried to get me to drink or what the doctor said about more vitamins, or why I'm flirting with Aphrodite's boyfriend." 

But he says nothing, no words about what Patti said the other day about him not being real, and nothing about the story I made up about a future life.

Maybe he can't imagine you as an Uber driver, the Mean Girls say.  Shouldn't you be studying - history? The Mean Girls ask.

Lately, Marianne plays classical guitar.  And she bought new plants for the porch, bushy ferns she waters every day.  The Mean Girls live in these healthy plants; their hair is green, thick, and they say, Marianne just asked you about George, and it's important.  Don't you listen?

"George isn't coming back."

Marianne asks when my next appointment is with Patti.  She sounds concerned.  The beach is still here.  Strangely, I feel better about that.  It's cloudy and looks as if it's going to rain.  People sun on the sand under heavy, dark clouds and picnic anyway drinking beer, laying out platters of food as if they plan to stay out for the whole day.  Beast lathers on sunscreen and disappears in one of the parties on the shore.  I glance back at Marianne and shrug about the meds and open my reader.  Sometimes I wish she could see this place - the ocean in our tiny back yard on any day, and the volley ball boys and girls in the middle of a game.  And I say, "Stop moping about men for a while."