All the Things

I wish Mickey said the night of the block party.  

1. The stuff Julio says about the train is all bull.

2. It won’t really take you out of here.

3. It can’t travel as fast as you want it to.

4. It will never take you as far as you want to go.

5. You will still see yourself in the morning wherever it is you end up.

6. Only superstars are re-born in places like California.

7. Don’t give up on your mom.

8. You will look for your lost self every day until you find her.  And you will always be missed.

9.  Stay.

10.  Don’t go.

And later that night I hear a train.  Where does she come from?  It is almost as if she passed through many cold places before coming here – even her graffiti eyes freeze everything out, but it doesn’t matter I get on.  All I see as we take off is Grizzly standing silent on Aunt Ally’s front lawn surrounded by the dirty looks of friends and neighbors (people that don’t really know my aunt or have any idea of her life, our life.)  I think about what went wrong this time, but only for a moment.